Caveat: If you are only looking for Tandem Bike stories that sing their praises, then read no further. If you are looking for the truth, then read on….

Anyway, last May we celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary. That night my husband had flowers and a large box wrapped in silver paper with a big red bow on top waiting for me when I got home. I could not imagine what was in such a big box. It was a set of panniers. The accompanying card had a picture of a tandem bike enclosed. My first thought – which I graciously spoke aloud – was ‘Please tell me this is a rental.’ (He’s been known to make big gear purchases on impulse). He assured me it was. Along with the picture of the bike was a map of Western Marin. The very next morning we set off….

Day One: Mill Valley to Bodega Bay.

We took off straight from our driveway – in the rain – at about 11am, with Chris in front and me pulling up the rear. Lesson One: If you have to ride a tandem bike – be in front. The rider in back does not get to sit and coast like many of the people who saw us that weekend assumed – she has to operate both the front chain that is shared with the front rider – and the back chain that she gets to work all by herself. Make no mistake about it. The front rider is the captain that gets to steer the ship. The back rider is the little engine that could that gets to keep her head down and pedal.

We headed straight up hill for about 6 miles to the top of the Panoramic ridge that separates Mill Valley from the vast open space on the western slopes of Mount Tamalpais out to the Pacific Ocean. Neither of us had ever ridden a tandem bike. And we had clip in pedals. Immediately I realized what an intense experience this was going to be. Lesson Two: When riding a tandem bike, you need to be perfectly in sync and communicate any moves you are going to make well beforehand.

A few hours later, we stopped for lunch and a beer in Point Reyes at the Cowgirl Creamery, where we stocked up on bottles of wine and cheese and sausage to be consumed at our glampsite in Bodega Bay that evening – and easily adding 10+ lbs. to our panniers for the remaining 30+ miles we had to cover that day. Lesson Three: No consuming alcohol unless you are done riding for the day. Refer back to Lesson Two. Lesson Four: Do not Add Weight to your Bike.

We arrived at our destination in the late afternoon/early evening. The glampsite was beautiful and we enjoyed a break in the rain and an almost sunset while we drank our wine and ate our cheese and sausage.

Day Two: Bodega Bay to Healdsburg.

The next morning dawned clear and sunny and as we mounted the bike and headed out to ride along the ocean’s edge on HWY 1, I was already missing yesterday’s rain. Lesson Five: Be careful what you wish for. It was the Saturday of Memorial Day weekend and there was no shortage of camper vans on the narrow coastal road. Lesson Six: Take the road less travelled. Eventually we turned off of the coast road and headed back inland on beautiful desolate roads that meandered through meadows full of tall grasses and wildflowers. Simply stunning. My allergies were on fire though so I was constantly blowing out one nostril and then the other throughout the day. Lovely.

This day and the next was spent going up and over a series of ridges, so a lot of our time on the bike was spent going uphill. You really can’t post on a tandem bike. Something I hadn’t even considered. Lesson Seven: Make sure you have a comfortable seat.

We stayed that evening at a fancy little inn that was just a cluster of super modern minimalist rooms around a pool.  When we pulled up, there was no one there and the door to the front desk area was locked so we had to wait around like a couple of vagabonds in our sweat encrusted biking attire with the tandem bike parked amidst the sports cars and high-end SUVs that dominated the small lot. The host, when at last he returned, was so pleased we had arrived by tandem bike though – they were all avid cyclists – that he insisted on taking our photo with the bike out in front of the hotel.

We spent the late afternoon lounging about in the pool and the hot tub sipping beers and ciders. After a shower and a ‘nap’ (wink wink, nod nod) we headed out for a completely over-indulgent night with a delicious dinner and amazing cocktails and plenty of wine.

Day three: Healdsburg to St. Helena.

After a hearty, over-indulgent breakfast – trying to soak up the contents of last night’s over-indulgence – we went to the closest bike shop and bought a comfy new seat for yours truly. Total Game changer.  We were facing another day full of long uphill segments, and there’s no way I would have made it without the new seat. Lesson Eight: If something is bugging you, fix it. Ideally sooner rather than later.

It was a hot day – in the nineties – and in our effort to avoid the roads more travelled, we were going up and down over ‘mountain’ passes at an alarming rate. I was hungover and totally dehydrated. Lesson Nine: Don’t over-indulge before your third day of 50+ hilly miles on a tandem bike . Thank &%$# for my ‘Bliss’ stick – it really helped keep me focused on the task at hand. Namely keeping my feet moving around in a circular motion at the same speed as my husband, who is eight inches taller than me – all in the legs. Lesson Ten: Do Not Hesitate to Self Medicate.

We pulled into the lodge in St. Helena around dusk and left the bike by the valet parking stand while we went to check in. People look at you strangely when you arrive by tandem bike – with a mixture of admiration and repulsion. That night we took an uber to a restaurant in town as we did not want to ride under the influence. As it turned out, our uber driver – who was doing a bit of freelance work to help fund her weekend at the Bottlerock music festival in Napa – was under the influence of something too…

Day Four: St. Helena to Mill Valley.

The next day I woke up sore and sunburnt and not exactly eager to bang out the 80 or so miles that remained between us and home. We ate a light breakfast and mounted up. It became immediately obvious that this was going to be a rough day. It was at least 95 degrees by 9am. More like 105 degrees on the pavement with the passing vehicle traffic, and the majority of the ride was set to happen on roads full of Memorial Day traffic – many returning from the aforementioned Bottlerock – exhausted and still processing the toxins in their bodies. Not exactly who you want to ‘share the road’ with…

We ran out of water after about 30 miles and things were starting to look dire.  We were on Hwy 116 coming in to Petaluma with a string of cars and vans and their hot exhaust as our constant companion, when Ernie’s Tin Bar came into view.  It was like a shimmering mirage. An oasis in the middle of the desert. Chris pulled in so we could refill our water bottles and I informed him that this was the end of the road for me. That I was going to call our teenage daughters to have one of them come get us with our Sprinter van so we could load up the tandem beast and enjoy the last 40 miles in air conditioned comfort.  Much to my surprise, he concurred. We made the call and went in to Ernie’s for some refreshment while we waited. Several Pints and even more bags of chips later – Ernie’s is actually an auto mechanic shop on one side and a bar on the other – so no kitchen – the girls arrived and we loaded up the tandem bitch and headed home – bearing several Ernie’s Tin Bar beer glasses and t-shirts of course.

All in all we rode about 180 miles – of a planned 220 – with over 7600 feet of elevation gain and loss in four days. It was truly an amazing, visual, physical, mental, and emotional experience and I told my husband that I was fully on board with doing multiple day/week bike tours all over the world once our daughters were all off in college, which is happening this year, but….. 

I want to ride MY OWN DAMN BIKE :).